 VECTOR
Here is my cache. Read on to learn of my undoing.
"We require your assistance again" they said.
I said "No."
"You will place another Vector.” they said.
I said "No."
"This time it will be on Navicache, they said.
I said "No, besides nobody uses Navicache here.”.
"They will use Navicache, they will find it, they will be infected and become our pod zombies."
Again I said, "No"
They showed me the picture of their 4 armed proctologist and his collection of probes.
"No" I said, but I had a queasy feeling. The memories were painful.
They showed me a picture of my daughters serving as interns at the Bill Clinton Presidential Library.
I caved. "I'll do it I said, but you are wrong, they won't come, they won't follow the rules, they won't play the game. Geocachers are smarter than that. They know about you now."
"It doesn't matter what they know, if you hide it they will come, that's all we need." They handed me the rules, they gave me the transcript of their conversations planning the enslavement of humanity. Their parting instruction was "just like before, but use Navicache."
As required here are the rules as dictated to me. When it comes to enforcing the rules the aliens did provide for
some assistance. Anyone who doesn't follow them will be visited by my friend's six-armed brother. After that visit
having the log deleted would only be a minor inconvenience.Last time nobody needed to get the visit. Hopefully nobody will this time either.
This cache is a 30cal Ammo Can with Log Book.
Take one canister and plant it in an urban setting as a geocache.
The word Vector has to appear in the cache description.
Log your find AFTER your new cache has been approved.
Until your new cache is approved a note is ok.
Provide a link to that cache in your log.
Anything else is automatically deleted by microbots with no notice so don't complain to me.
This is the transcript they gave me. Read it and know the truth.
Sub commander. Sub commander? SUB COMANDER, TURN OFF EARTH GIRLS ARE EASY, AND PAY ATTENTION!
"Sorry boss, just eating some cheetos and doing some more research"
"As I was saying. Vector was a partial success, the Terrans spread the Vector to Illinois, California, and Idaho. New breeder caches have sprang up further spreading the vector. However in spite of this initial success we still have not spread the DNA re-sequenceing nanobots far enough to affect enough of the Terran population to achieve our goals. How can we further spread the contamination?"
"Boss, after more exhaustive research I've learned there is another cache site. Navicache. They are a different breed of cacher. They will spread it further."
"Sub commander, What do you know of this Navicache?"
"It's a collection of people who seem to get along better than other cachers, however they are fiercely independent and generally reject the mainstream. They are independent thinkers. They would make superior pod zombies"
"Sub commander, good thinking, by reaching a different population segment we introduce the nanobots to completely different geographic locations and that will spread our nonbots globally, at an increasingly faster exponential rate"
"You lost me boss"
"Sub commander, I don't know how you manage to remember how to breathe, implement the plan…Sub commander why is your zipper orange?"
"…uh…er…"
The supreme commander thought for a moment and said "Nevermind, after you implement the plan throw yourself in the recycling pod. Mulch is a better career path for you."
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VECTOR
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